As a Dallas-born Chinese Asian-American, I was raised with some major Chinese values. That’s not to say I observe things like the Mid-Autumn Festival with great respect or that I even know how to properly use chopsticks. What I mean is that I’m pretty cheap. While I like to think of it as frugal, I have no qualms about the way I run a practical and necessity-based purchasing system.

Russell Peter’s wasn’t joking or at least he wasn’t wrong in his assessment when he layered on his thick Cantonese accent and did his bit about how Chinese people are total penny-pinchers.

I once drove 77 miles from South Pasadena to Victorville, Calif. so that I could save $15 on shipping and handling charges on a great deal I got on some Sony Memory Sticks. I later realized that the $15 I saved ended up being spent on gas; not to mention the fact that I lost about four hours of my life making that trip. Nevertheless, Circuit City wasn’t getting any of my hard-earned cash for S&H. Why? Because I’m Chinese. That’s just the way we roll.

Years spent eating off the fast-food value menu, to the detriment of my own health, also went a long way in preserving my Chinese desire to save money. There’s a special feeling about the ability to get full off of $2.14 at the Jack in the Box drive-thru. That special feeling actually is a quiet killer that packs on about a pound every week until you realize that you should probably not roll by the fast-food window at 2 a.m. What are you supposed to do when you’re in college though?

I think part of the whole reason Chinese people are so anti-spending is because so much of what is out there is either more than you need or just not useful. Why blow $40 for your family to eat at Denny’s when you can take them to McDonald’s for $15? Why purchase the name-brand lawnmower when you can get a pair of scissors and cut the lawn yourself?

Now, I know this is probably nothing to brag about, but this is who I am, or at least who I was. I can attest to the fact that I have changed (matured perhaps) over the years. The healthy eating thing has been well documented through plenty of photography. However, how did I finally realize that I was over the whole “cut corners and save money” bit? I don’t even know, honestly.

These days, thanks to the examples around me, I’ve broken free from the ridiculous Chinese stigma that surrounded me for so many years. I used to purposely not eat at sporting events or movie theaters because I felt as though it was such a “bad deal” to pay $4 for popcorn. Don’t get me wrong, it’s still a terrible deal and those places are making a killing off of the sales of such items.

Here’s the caveat though; that’s the whole point. You’re supposed to get killed on things like buying food at amusement parks and sporting events. I realized eventually that, if I want to enjoy a Polish sausage on this particular bench at Disneyland, I’ll need to buy the Polish sausage at Disneyland; not smuggle it in through my mother’s purse and then bust it out half squashed and cold.

I’m far more willing to spend money on a lavish meal or pay to experience something because of the mere fact that the moment to execute such a payment exists only in that moment. I had a hard time deciding whether or not to go to New York with a couple of friends earlier this year, but after some thought, the reason I hit the “Buy Now” button on the JetBlue website was because I came to the conclusion that this particular set of circumstances will never again present themselves. My friends were about to get married. Who knows, I might have kids by that time next year. I found out I was going to move from Southern California to Northern California and did so in a matter of 19 days. Things change; quick.

So what does any of this have to do with tissue? A couple of weeks ago, April and I happened to arrive at Bay Street Emeryville with our leftover Pottery Barn gift card in the car. We received the gift card for our wedding more than two years ago even though we didn’t have a Pottery Barn registry or anything. It was a $50 card and if you know anything about Pottery Barn, you know it’s pretty easy to spend at least $50 there. However, we never wanted to go for the over-priced expensive stuff they had on the shelves and eventually ended up purchasing a cheese serving set that we’ve only used once.

For two years, we’ve been walking around with a $19 balance remaining on our card. There have been countless instances upon which we’ve gone to Bay Street without the card and without the desire to purchase anything, so it’s been a sort of a running joke. This time was different though.

After walking around the store in circles for about 20 minutes, we finally decided to get a rattan tissue box. It’s part of the Tava line of bath accessories in case you’re interested in purchasing something for yourself. I was happy we finally chose something and that we were about to be rid of that $19 balance, but I can’t say I was completely thrilled about the prospect of putting that rattan box into our bathroom. I mean, it’s a box that fits over your tissue box. Yes, it was brown and matched the color motif in our apartment, but seriously? Tissue comes in a box already. Why do you need to put a box inside a box? It made no sense to me at the time.

When we got home, I put the box over the box and let it sit there. It was pleasant to look at, but still, the whole need for it to be a utilitarian item ate at my inner Chinese sensibilities. Please cut me some slack; I just paid for a fancy box.

A couple of days ago, however, as I pulled a couple sheets of tissue from the box, I came to my senses. I realized that the box actually helps hold down the tissue box inside. Now, I know this isn’t some sort of gigantic world-wide epidemic, but I have had struggles with getting the single tissue paper that I’ve wanted in the past. All of a sudden, it made sense. The weight of this ridiculous rattan box was acting as an anchor on my tissue box. It not only looked nice, it was serving a useful purpose.

Now, while this is perhaps a silly isolated moment of realization, but I’m glad I was able to experience it through something as simple as a tissue box. I’ll never stop being Chinese, or at least I don’t think I will ever stop being Chinese, but I can stop carrying around the same cheap and sometimes unreasonable fiscal values that often get pegged to Chinese people.

Thanks, Pottery Barn, for showing me just how wonderful a rattan box can really be, and how to appreciate the simple things in life, no matter how much you ended up charging me for them.

Tags: Chinese, Circuit City, gift card, money, Pottery Barn, Sony Memory Stick, Tava bath accessories, tissue, values